Let them enjoy the rain…

Following is my first attempt at 55 fiction. I have tried to relay a very common incident in every day life. Please try to read it with feelings and give me your frank advice on how to improve.

And one more thing. I have blogrolled all of my friends with their unique names. If you happen to have any problem with your name, please let me know. I will correct it asap.

Here it goes….

LET THEM ENJOY THE RAIN…


She looks out the window.

A woman. Nursing her baby. Between four poles covered with polythene….
A boy. Rowing his paper boat. A black r
iver nearby….
A girl. covered in rags.


She wants to help them. Somehow.
Anyhow….

But. It is raining.


So…


She tells her driver….“Drive faster. Let them enjoy it. The rain…”

COMMENTS
TOTAL 90

RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
Welcome to my blog Paritosh…….
thank you very much..
I must admit that you are perhaps the only person who understood what I wanted to say….

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Paritosh @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
Wow!! I can relate to the woman in the car. We too wanna help when we see people living in such poor, deplorable condition. But then maybe we are too happy and satiated in our luxurious cocoons. We too wanna play in the rain, but we are disgusted with the muck. We also let them play in the rain…

Damn good!

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
thank you very much for your encouragement….
actually they know only one language and that is the language of money….

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Avada Kedavra @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
Sooo true.. some people are sooo stone hearted that they dont feel anything.. very nice attempt at fiction 55

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
yes Anshul you are spot on right..But I had to….
there were more than 55 words in the previous one.
and yes I also think more content could have done more justice…but word limit was the culprit u know…
btw I will take care that I won’t take such topic in which more ideas are required ….

thank you very much for the ‘thought’ thing…I am happy that u got my basic idea!!

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Anshul @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
Hey Rahul have you made any changes in this?
The previous one seemed much more emphasizing!
And i think there could have been more content.
The idea was fantastic. Nice thought! Keep it up!

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
I assure you I will have a proper appellation for you after some more ‘study’ of your blog..
but don’t worry I would ask u first before I change it in my blogroll..

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Shas @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 0 replies · 0 points
Welcome!!

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Shas @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
No, you don’t need to change. Am ok with it. I asked coz i was a bit curious as to what made you think like that.

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
Thank you very much for your nice encouragement,….
and yes u raised it right…i wanted to write on a ‘heavy metal social topic’!!

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
opera 10 mmm….
I will also see it!!

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Lakshmi Rajan @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
Hmmm … good attempt to start with and on a heavy metal social topic… I don’t have much to say on the critical part as such many have said about that before me. Looking forward to your next 55F … 🙂

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shankar @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
yup.I got it.. ur comment form is not working with older version of opera… Now it’s fine with opera 10… looks good..

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 2 replies · +1 points
he he…
its in your “about me”..
My words wait to unfold the mysteries encased in a complex being called Me…

on a serious note, if you want me to change it temme…I will change it now…

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Shas @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 3 replies · 0 points
Hey! Rahul, I kinda liked the bit of a title or the unique name that you have given me. I would love to know what makes you perceive me as a complex being. Waiting for your reply. =)

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 1 reply · +1 points
mmm…
I think you are right…I am changing it…
thanks….

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Shas @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 2 replies · 0 points
Good start.
Am a bit confused. Shouldn’t it be ‘nursing her baby’ instead of ‘milking her baby’. Plz correct me if am wrong.

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
aap mano yaa na mano…
main abhi aapke hi blog ko padh raha tha…..
haan thoda busy tha…but I will make it….’
I never leave a good piece mind you!!

and yes that is dark humor..

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Thousif Raza @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
Rahul i would say that is a great attempt, with a lil bit or dark humor ummm ummm, its a recipe for perfectness, i liked it a lot, and i dint see you on my last post, kya huwa busy the kya, and congrats on the award yaar, you are the most worthy to earn it, congrats once again

tke care and keep writing…………

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
sure!!

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Shruti @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
Thank God that you have not mistaken me!
Btw, check out my new post!

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 2 replies · +1 points
Are shruti that was the best comment I have ever had…
kya baat karti ho….
i was just writing my newest post…

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Shruti @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 3 replies · 0 points
Hey hope you have not mistaken me for my comments!
I tried to be very frank! Sorry!

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
Welcome to my blog Rakesh….
other way round? I am sorry I couldn’t get what you want to say?

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Rakesh Vanamali @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
Striking picture! A sad reflection of urban India! But hey……..whats with the woman milking the baby? I didn’t get it…..isn’t it supposed to be the other way round?

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 2 replies · +1 points
thank you very much for your honest and kind comment..
I hope ki main aapki aakanshaon pe khara utroon…

and did u finally get it? hehe…….disappearing comment form eh!!
hehe…..

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shankar @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 3 replies · 0 points
your first attempt… i would classify this under not bad category… But once you have attempted..you can always improve.I am sure to see a good one in future…. lucky i got ur comment form today..most of the time its invisible for me…So dont mind If i didnt comment… Whenever I see ur comment form…I will comment…

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
thank you boss..I will check it out!!

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Toon India @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
nice attempt dude..and I have replied to your comment

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
and now the explanation part..
‘enjoying the rain’ is an excuse made by the rich lady to suppress the emotional self of hers, a fake self -justification to explain her guilty self that what she is doing is right……because she can’t do anything…
It may appear to some that ‘enjoying the rain’ is bit of an overstatement and is practically seldom or never made….but then it is my imagination..

I feel that even those ‘heartless’ people have hearts but they always let their satanic part to win…

actually I wanted to make it a bit hazy myself… just for the extra pleasure of PUN which was imbibed involuntarily….

I swear that I won’t be that hazy wef my next post..

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 1 reply · +1 points
Welcome to my blog, Arjun..
I am happy that you find my blog “great and happening”….
don’t worry it has happened to many times…there was particular teacher in my school who always called me Rohit..inspite of my many reminders…

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Arjun @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 2 replies · 0 points
Din’t quite get it completely.. I mean, her words to the driver… 🙂

But, ur blog looks gr8 and happening.. 🙂

Hey, and btw.. In my post i had mentioned ur name.. But i mistook u for Rohit… sorry.. Now i know u r Rahul.. hehe

Cheers..!!
Arjun

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
thank you for visiting and appreciating…

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Urmi @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 3 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
Very beautifully written. I liked your post very much as its very interesting with lovely pictures.

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
I checked it.
Thanks for replying back to my silly emotional outburst.

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
I am following it publicly now….
I think that means I am now a member. right?

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
Now the concept…It can be explained as:
‘enjoying the rain’ is an excuse made by the rich lady to suppress the emotional self of hers, a fake self -justification to explain her guilty self that what she is doing is right……because she can’t do anything…
It may appear to some that ‘enjoying the rain’ is bit of an overstatement and is practically seldom or never made….but then it is my imagination..

I feel that even those ‘heartless’ people have hearts but they always let their satanic part to win…

actually I wanted to make it a bit hazy myself… just for the extra pleasure of PUN which was imbibed involuntarily….
I hope you feel what I want the readers to feel..

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 1 reply · +1 points
thank you very much Shruti for your kind and constructive suggestions and advice..
I have taken care of all the suggestions and changed the post a little bit…
plz tell me is it fine??

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Shruti @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 2 replies · 0 points
RSV,
Am really happy that you tried this genre! But i don understand the concept exactly 😦
Am sorry!
Again some advice!
**55Fiction should contain only 55words or less! But yours have 57 words! Try using word counter!
**Avoid dots between lines that will help the readers to continue interestingly!
**Don’t insert pics in between your 55fiction! Attach at the top or bottom or sides of the fiction!

Don’t think am advising you! I learnt all these while writing mine! Sorry if i had told anything wrong!

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
thank you Murali…for you understood what I wanted to say..
cheers!!

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Murali @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
Supressing one’s own guilt by wilfully trying to fool ourselves…..nice ! 🙂

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
thank you very much.,ma’am(main baaz nahi aaunga!!)
its all your best wishes and blessings…

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
coming to the point of dots…
yes I like putting the dots too much but I am learning!!
and definitely such sentimental articles won’t be asked in formal GRE and Toefl..

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 1 reply · +1 points
actually I wanted to make it a bit hazy myself… just for the extra pleasure of PUN which was imbibed involuntarily….

now the point of Intellectual….first of all there is no one here with superior intellect….but you are definitely the who has more experience and exposure…ye to aapki aur meri baat….
in general when I read your posts I always get something important to learn and something which challenges my mind..
hence the name..

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 2 replies · +1 points
lets get point by point..
1. I will simply quote what I said to AD
‘enjoying the rain’ is an excuse made by the rich lady to suppress the emotional self of hers, a fake self -justification to explain her guilty self that what she is doing is right……because she can’t do anything…
It may appear to some that ‘enjoying the rain’ is bit of an overstatement and is practically seldom or never made….but then it is my imagination..

I feel that even those ‘heartless’ people have hearts but they always let their satanic part to win…

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Rohini @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
Congrats on your other two awards. 🙂 I feel good that you got them.. i am sure there are more that wil find their way to you and your blog.

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Rohini @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 3 replies · 0 points
nicely written. Although I am a bit confused.. Does she want to drench them in more rain and thus help? Or maybe she doesnt want to disturb them right now ‘cos they are enjoying the rain.. ha.. I am in knots.. LOL.

“the intellectual” I am honored flattered and again confused. I am so scatter brained.. I can’t imagine being called an intellectual by someone with superior intellect like you 😀 surely you are not mocking me right.. 😉 haha.. feels good though 😀

And.. hmm.. I know this may sound crazy.. but I hope you don’t reduce the dots too many (@Aditya, who wants you to 😀 ) .. Sometimes, they serve a better purpose than commas.. but then that is what I feel. Thought you should know the other opinion too.

Hey you know, I am so addicted to these dots, I had a tough time not putting them in in my GRE essays and TOEFL essays. heehee.. you might want to practice without them for formal writing.. just a thought.

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
“she doesn’t want to get sad” that is just an excuse…she won’t have come out and helped them even if it would have been a sunny day…
and your advice duly noted sir..I will take care
its so nice of you..really..

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
Thank you Pramoda….
the pics reflect my mind…

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Aditya @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
Interesting post. I liked it. The lady didnt help them because she doesn’t want to get wet in the rain? Sad she didnt have a spare umbrella 😛

Advice: try reducing the ‘dots’ between your lines when you write next time. They spoil the flow in my opinion.

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pramoda @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
Interesting!!!

The pics are looking soo genuine..:)

Keep expressing 🙂

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
Welcome to my blog smm….
thank you very much….

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smm @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
interesting
like the pics also

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
thank you…. I am happy….

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adesi @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 1 reply · +1 points
now when you explain it, it becomes clearer 🙂

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 2 replies · +1 points
the lady is unable to think actually…I never wanted her make a villain…. we are all like her…
‘enjoying the rain’ is an excuse made by the rich lady to suppress the emotional self of hers, a fake self -justification to explain her guilty self that what she is doing is right……because she can’t do anything…
It may appear to some that ‘enjoying the rain’ is bit of an overstatement is practical seldom or never made….but then it is my imagination..

I feel that even those ‘heartless’ people have hearts but they always let their satanic part to win…

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adesi @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 3 replies · +1 points
wow!!! but i m still curious wht the lady was thinkin

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IndianPunditi @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
i replied.

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IndianPunditi @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 0 replies · 0 points
Check your email.

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IndianPunditi @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
i think u are following blogs privately……….FOLLOW PUBLICLY!!!!

Your icon is NOT SHOWING in the followers widget in blog-a-ton blog

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
thank you….I am following it….so now I can participate in blog-a-ton 3…

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IndianPundit @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
Start following the Blog-a-ton blog.

Simple.

Then u can participate in Blog-a-ton3.

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
thank you Benny for such encouraging words….
I will try…surely…to do more justice to it in future…

cheers:)

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
Sure IP….
just checking it!!

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
thank you rimz…I always look for the answer people leave for my comment in their blog..I saw it in your blog…

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Rimz @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
arrey campussing means placement interviews n d following and preceding procedure…:)

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IndianPundit @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
Visit my blog.

i have something for you

Cheers

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
and now I realize that I have failed terribly to relay what I really meant to……

actually I am using this sentence as a PUN, ‘enjoying the rain’ is an excuse made by the rich lady to suppress the emotional self of hers, a fake self justification to explain her guilty self that what she is doing is right……

I feel that even those ‘heartless’ people have hearts but they always let their satanic part to win…

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VeNkY @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
how do they enjoy the rain

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
well You are correct in many respects….
its like 20-20 in front of better one- ODI’s..

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Rimz @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
haha… nothing abt encouraging or not encouraging, actually it may b seeming to u coz, i love long ones, dan dese short ones, as i feel so many things remain unsaid n left for the reader to make n feel… well dat may be good sometimes, but its tooo short……:)

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
thanx and congrats…
but your words don’t sound too encouraging.!!

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
I am finding it quite interesting…
you must try it rimz….I think u can write really beautiful 55-stories..
just try once..

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
he he….

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
Thanks IP for ur encouraging words….
yes some “educated” people are actually so much depraved that they don’t remain educated…..

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Rimz @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
ooo ya thnx n congrats for the award… m honored.

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Rimz @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
well i hve quiet less knowledge abt dis 55-thing…so i liked it…..:)

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IndianPundit @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
Sorry its “big time”………not “nig time”……

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IndianPundit @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
Great first attempt.

Hypocrisy and utter stupidity of the so called “educated” classes sucks nig time.

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Benny @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
hey Rahul,gud attempt.. I liked it.. 🙂 hoping to see more of u r writings in this genre..CHEERS 😉 🙂

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
sure I will check it out…thanks….
an afterthought….(in a childish tone, with lower lips curled outside)
whaat aboout my 55 fiction??

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kasabiangirl @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
Hi Rahul…you have an award waiting for you on my blog 🙂

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
welcome to my blog Harish,,,,
I am happy that u liked the post….
and yes you are absolutely right the people are hypocritical!!

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 2 replies · +1 points
driving fast will help the ‘rich lady’ to escape the scene earlier…
and the profile pic is indeed slimmer as it was taken an year back…i hope to get the figure soon..

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
i was sure you would understand it and I am happy that you liked it….

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RSV @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 0 replies · +1 points
the car lady does sympathise(momentarily) with the poor but does not help them……she is more concerned about her being not drenched in the rain…
regarding suggestions….gimme some time!!

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Harish Thangaraj @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
Hey nice attempt…! Unfortunately ours is a highly hypocritical world..

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Singh Amit @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
I loved it… 🙂
An apt attempt to reveal the blindness and insensitivity of rich people towards the poor people….

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Musings @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 1 reply · 0 points
Hi! the fiction is quite contrived. What’s on the mind of car lady?
Hei do you have any suggestions to bring my blog appear on the recent updates??? I tried all magic (changed all modes in Site feed to Yes; still not successful). Gimme any suggestions you have 🙂

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VeNkY @ The Skeptical Observer – My first 55 attempt… 4 weeks ago · 3 replies · 0 points
I didnt get it buddy how does driving fast help. Hey was that profile pic taken you look a lot slimmer in that

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