15. He loves me. He loves me not.

Please go through the following terms and conditions before going through this may-be-highly-controversial monologue.

1. It does not, in any way, relate the emotions of any of the students’ of INGLEES HONORS KILAAS, even if, the post is the fifteenth chapter of my life in HRC.
2. The people addressed to, or indicated in this monologue of a girl, does not, in any way, are the students of INGLEES HONORS KILAAS.
3. I don’t intend to hurt the emotions of people I know and love in any, known or unknown, way.
4. ” ” and ” “, please don’t kill me after reading this post.
5. Others: Please don’t fill in the blanks.

The first time I saw him, he was talking to other boys of the class. Smart, handsome and well groomed. A vibrant ray of inexplicable confidence was oozing out of him. He was laughing hard… a laugh of a child… innocent… yet there was a maturity in it never seen before. It was not love at first sight. May be it was. No.Yes…

He was friendly with other people of the new class. His magnetic persona attracted people towards him in no time. Everyone was yearning to befriend him. I was no different. I too approached him. I shook his hand. The touch… But he was as amiable as before. I expected a special response!!

Days converted into weeks. Hi’s converted into silent yet all conversing smiles. We would meet everyday. We would talk to each other. We would play funny games with other. With each passing day, my admiration for him touched newer heights. With each passing day, my love for him increased manifold. Love? Silly me. Can I call it as love? Isn’t it just infatuation? Or rather, as I said, respect?

He has a great sense of humor. He possesses a sharp wit. I like these qualities in a man. Everyone likes these qualities in a man. So everyone flocks around him incessantly. I don’t like it.

Somehow I feel that he knows that I like him. I know that he likes me. But why does he behave in such a manner to me? I try to catch his attention. I try to make him aware of my presence. But he feigns ignorance. Why does he do it? Tell me, why do you do it?

May be this is my imagination. May be, he does not like me at all. May be… his negligence is part of his refusal to me…may be… But I won’t stop myself. I will continue burning myself in this agony until I find his answer. Yes or no. I don’t care. No No… I care… 😦